What do you do when your feeling changed?

What do you do when you don't have anymore feeling for your boyfriend or girlfriend. Yet, your lover did not do anything wrong and it still love you. Also after this, you saw someone else and you have feeling for him/her. So what do you do?

As a boy for is good, usually I think they will ignore and don't care about that. They will continue with their relationship. Just that he will not do as much. However, he will still try his best. I would this kind of boy. My reason and logic is that as a lover, you should be responsible and loyal. No one can have this love excitement feelings for ever until there is alot of life and death situation for you everyday or your just live with this partner away from society. Plus, when you don't have this excitement feeling anymore but you will have the developement feelings. You should appreciated this feeling. This is more happy then that excitement feeling. "To love with just feeling not true love. True love is love with your mind as well." By me (H.Wu)

For boys who really want excitement: They will break up in a sneaky. They will use a strategy like making an excuse for breaking up. Like sometime girl can get unreasonable and get angry at a boy. This is a chance for a boy to escape. So this way it seems like that did not do anything bad or wrong. It is the girl fault or he had enough of her temper. Something like that. This is a weakness of girls since they get upset very easily.

For girls, I think very loyal will stay with the boy. But now I don't know. I realized that girls are out of control if they have feeling for another boy, they go crazy and might leave. As long as the girl does not go near that boy often, they will be safe and won't cheat or anything like that. So id you are a girl, can you post your comments about girl in this situation?

Very deeply in love.

Who is very deeply in love with someone?

Many people are just in love with someone but they are not really that in love with their partner. Why? When they break up, they just find another partner. So I want to ask, to what degree do you love your partner?

The strongest type of love is baka(stupid): You love someone that you will use your life to wait for this person. You will not care about any other people or anyone that actually give you some feelings. Even if the person that you love is not worth it, you will continue to believe in him/her without caring how painful or hurt you are. Always think of the lover first before themself.

Second place type is someone that will love their lover. They will give chance to their partner but limited. They will protect their lover with their life. Also will respect them. Actually, I did not mention this in the strongest type of love above but it also contains this.

Third place type is someone that will still protect their lover with their life and respect them. But wouldn't give chances if they betray you one time.

So on to the 4th, 5th and...

So do you have what it takes to be the strongest type? I am somewhat close to the first type. Cause there is someone that I like so much that I keep thinking of her and I don't mind enduring pain for my life. sobsob! I don't want to say too much about this. lolz!!

p.s Oh! I forgot to say! When come to love, I decided to be stupid then be smart. That is my way of love. hehe

Rejecting someone you like/love?

Have you ever reject someone that you like when they indirectly confessed to you?

I did and I did it twice and did not even realized that after I asked my friends two to three years later(2010). Ahhh! I am super slow. Yes! It took me 2 to 3 years to realized that what happen and why we did not talk anymore. One time (2006), I took it as if she was referring to something negative. The other time(2008), was that I was playing 2 games at a time and did not pay close attention and told her "we are friends" and I liked them. Oh to be clear, I am not making fun of them. I just feel very stupid when I think about it. So that is my story.

What is your story? Any of these experience? Any comments?

In your life time, you will meet 4 persons.

"In your life time, you will encounter 4 persons.
The first person is yourself.
The second person is the person you love the most.
The third person is the person that loves you the most.
The fourth person is the person you will be with for life.
Person number 2, 3, and 4, will it be the same person? It depends on your fate."

Don Li and Mandy Chiang



It is kind of true except these who are not going to love or stay single for life. But do you think that your partner is the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th person? It is rare! Maybe the person you are with might not be the person that you will be with for life or they actually might not be the 3rd person for you. Human can lie or keep quiet about certain things. They can look so honest and there is no prove to tell if they are lying or telling the truth. So all you can do is to trust him/her. Cause if you truly love someone, you don't need prove. lolz 

But I have to say, having someone that love you the most is harder to find compared to someone that you love. Actually, it does not feeling that great to love someone alot while they only love you a little. Cause it is very easy for you to have love sick and get upset very easily. Instead, finding someone who love you more is better. Because they are willing to do more for you and so on.

But it would be funny if all four person is yourself. Narcissist!!!

So what do you think? Any comments? Maybe you might disagree with me about finding someone that love you more then you love them. I know everyone wants to find what they love. But it is just painful later with an exception that you have a lucky chance that you find the person who is number 2, 3, and 4. Lolz 

When you love a person you should...

"When you love a person you should love how they originally look like. You have to love their good and bad side. Also love their positive and negative personality."

Mandy Chiang and Don Li

Do you agree? When you love someone you should accept everything about him/her instead of adopting to them. You should not based it on whether you like it or not. Each person have things they like and don't like. Sometimes when you change someone, you might realized the change is may cause you to dislike it even more. Cause becoming different will also change the positive things about them too. Some good things come with a balance of some negative things that person have. 

Don't you agree?

Break up because .....

It is funny, some people actually break up because they love each other too much. Why?
It is because it is painful and hurts when you want that person to do something but fails to do so.
So they don't want to feel that pain and decided to end it even though they love each other.

First, many time people break up because of a rash and angry moment. Actually they still love each other. If they come back and talk to each other, you will probably still find that you still love each other. Is that true for you?

What is your reason for breaking up? Did you actually regret after you declared a break up the next moment (not now)?

Waiting and pain

Have you been in a situation where you love someone and that person either does not like you or make you wait? Haha! I experienced  both one time. I know it is very sad. I really hate it. For me, I was not able to concentrate on anything at that moment. Thinking about it make me feel hurts. So why I mention this? That is because I have two friends which one of them is in a similar situation. I can understand his feelings. He is only waiting. But I remember waiting was definitely very painful. It probably make that person remember this painful experience for ever. I really wish to help my friend but I don't know what to do. Cause both of them is my close friend and one of them is hurting the other one.

So what is your experience? Anything similar and can share?

Difference between girls and boys having feelings for others

How often do you have feelings for guy/girl when you saw one passing by or with a group of friends?

I have to say that it is easy for boys (even ones with girlfriends) to have feelings for many girls they randomly see. So I kind of feel like this is something that is so common for boys to the point that they don't think of it as anything important or special. Of course, unless it is the type of boys who are willing to cheat or does not have a girlfriend and wants one would go for them. But let's talk about the ones that won't cheat or have more self control. They actually still have feelings for other girl. Don't you think so, Mr Boy? Of course, maybe this is so common to you that you don't even consider that as feeling.  So they don't have to care about this. But if this is like this way then it is different: first boys become friends with a girl and feelings are being developed. If more then one girl, then it depends on how things goes. The result is can be that I boy keep silent and end up with someone else, the boy will like one of the girl, can end up like both girls, or like both but choose one that he prefer more.
Hey love is not about feelings. It is self sacrificing.

As for girls, I find it weird. Girls seem like they don't have feeling for boys most of the boys. So when they have feelings for a boy, they actually go crazy. If the boy continue to attack her emotion. That girl can lost and be with him. Why I said this? This is because I learned some thing in biology, read a book about girl's brain and saw some very conscious who does not believe what I said who ended in this situation. So compared to boys, having feelings for a girl is like once in a blue moon. This is true, someone who is very conscious and does things to the point, and they think some people who is so crazy in the relationship was stupid actually ended up that way. It is not a bad thing to be that way. It is good to like someone that way. I also find it strange that when girls become best friends with a boy, they will say we are friends and only friends. Seems like becoming close as a friend with girl actually make the girl like you least while it is opposite for a boy. Last I was watching TV and some girl rejected guy by saying "...If there is anything that I gave you the wrong impression, I am sorry." I was like, "ahh being a girl is already making the boy attracted to you. You don't have to do anything."


I would say guys probably have feeling for girls at a rate of 8 girls per a minute. Which girls are 1/16 boys per a minute. Just an example. Not accurate prediction. But probably have similar approximation ratio result.

So I still think that it is like nothing when you have feelings for someone as a boy but it is really a big deal for a girl. Do you disagree? If you do, please post your comment.

But even if you disagree, it can't be proved. Because, a boy or a girl can't switch bodies to experience how they would feel if they change gender. Obvious, if you change body, your emotion will change, hormone will change and maybe your whole personality will change. So you will feel something totally different.

Why people get hurts in a relationship so easily?

Do you know why people get upset in a relationship so easily?

Maybe you do. One of the reasons is people express all their emotions to their partner since these people believe they are the person that they can trust and can show their wild side, which also mean, not controlling what you do and what you say. In fact, there is another 2 reasons cause these people to get hurt.

 

Reason 2:

Many people love someone using their emotion only, not their moral mind. I believe most of the people think, true love is always control by your mind, it is not true love. Love is by emotion. Because of that, it is easy to cause yourself to feeling up and down. Happy, sad, angry and crazy. So this way you can get negative more easily and cause problems. Emotion will cause a person to go crazy and might do something their mind won't have done.

Like "Oh, she fall down. I am her boy friend. I am suppose to panic or shows that I worry and care about her a lot." Yes you can say that he is acting. But at least he is willing to act. So he is sacrificing what he might not want to do to help her girlfriend. But how about if you think this way. Someone who love his girlfriend a lot but does not show much.

Like "I really love my girlfriend. But as long as she know it, then it is fine." Hey, it maybe true that the first guy might be acting. However, in reality, everyone see him as a caring person. While the second person is just feeling that he love her. In reality, if this action was never done, your love will never be expressed to the other person. If you did not express, then it is the same as never loved her. As you see, love is more on self sacrificing then to just have feeling. In the past, there are countless of people who start out without feeling and ended love each other so much later on. Why? Because there is no such thing as forcing yourself to do something. It is just if you let yourself to try.

Wait, I did not say you only have to love someone with your mind and have no feelings. That is just an example that even someone who does not have feeling can love better than someone that have feelings.

Hey, people does not have feeling 24/7. If they do, that is lovesick. It will be a problem in daily life. It is true. So it is normal for you to not to have feeling from time to time. But you will realize if something happen, you might panic and worry.

Of course, it would be good if you can love someone with your feelings, heart, and your mind. But ask yourself, do you love with your mind, your feelings or both. Sometime you don't know if you are doing so much for one person because it is your feeling that is controlling you or your mind is the one that is controlling you to do this much for this person. Because sometimes when you have feelings, you can't tell. I know about myself. I know my feeling clearly and my mind clearly. But do you?

Reason 3 is the main cause of this. Most people don't know about this. In fact, many people hand over their happiness to their lover. People always want the other person to do what he or she desire.

But no one in this world know what are you thinking and can do what you are thinking. Sometimes you handle over your happiness without knowing it. If you are expecting your lover to do something for you, then you are putting your happiness into someone else's hand. This will make yourself unhappy and blame your lover if he or she fail to do so. This is very bad for a relationship. You should keep you happiness to yourself (meaning don't expect anything from your lover but that does not mean you don't trust him or her) and maybe from time to time, your lover will surprise you.

To be honest, your happiness comes from inside of you. Not from outside. Even when people do things to make you happy. That is because you like what that person did. So your feelings still comes from yourself. Therefore, don't expect what your lover do for you and keep your happiness in your hands.

Hey, can you tell me what your lover always wants? Do you know what your lover is thinking about? You probably can't do what he/she is expecting from you. So you should not expect from your lover too.

HW

Don't know what is love!!!

You know many girls actually said that they don't know what is love. I am not too sure why!!!!
But I do have a slight idea of why they think this way. This is probably because they watch too many movies. In the movie, you feel that it is so romantic in a romance scene. Therefore, most likely these girls believe this is that love feeling. In fact, it is not. This is just some kind interesting scenes not much difference from a cool action movie. This is just one of the factors, but this is not always the case.


SECOND FACTOR IS BECAUSE OF THEIR FEELINGS. Girls feeling are affected by their hormones. They may feel something for one moment and nothing for the next moment. So even when they actually love the guy, they don't know it. That is why, sometime you need some bad situation like about to lose that person in order to know how important and much you love that person.

Last factor is that they sometime define love very complex. Actually love is very simple. Just being with that person and feeling happy and care if he is safe and health. Does not have to be like wanting to see you everyday. Does not have to be too crazy about the person.

So this is my definition of love. So for those of you who has problem and don't know what is love, what is you opinion? Please comment!!!!!

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P.S: I also want to know why some boys don't believe in love.

H.